The Way of Zen (Alan Watts)

Children are conditioned to accept the codes of the societies they are brought up in. They are reinforced with the symbol-systems of their parents, religions, schools, communities, cultures, peer groups, and so on.

They are influenced by these symbol-systems during their development, despite whether they follow them or rebel against them. Over time, they will internalize some aspects of these systems, interpreting them as “reality.”

One of the first symbol-systems that people learn is language. They find out what the agreed upon symbols to designate meaning are. Every culture has their own tacit agreements over not only the subtlest meanings of words but what words should be said and not said. Essentially, language acts as a tool. It is used to divide certain parts of “reality” into categories that make sense.

Children not only have to learn the codes of their language, but they learn, whether consciously or not, many other forms of agreement:

For the necessities of living together require agreement as to codes of law and ethics, of etiquette and art, of weights, measures, and numbers, and, above all, of role. We have difficulty in communicating with each other unless we can…